Episode 88: Geek Discussion: Learning and Growing in these Challenging Times

We all know the world is kind of an intense place right now. This episoded started with the intention of our geeky highs and lows… but very swiftly descended into a conversation about life, the Universe, and everything. We had a lot on our chests!

Okay, so we start out chattinga bout our geek highs and lows. Amandan’s high was definitely when she was in Edinburgh for the midnight release of Harry Potter and Half Blood Prince. Despite everything going on with the series’ author, that evil can’t take our happy memories away from us!

We chatted about how we think representation should be done in video games and other forms of pop culture. It’s all about making our differences part of the story and totally normalising it rather than any kind of bullshit and pointing it out and making it an othering statement.

That’s one reason we loved The Last of Us Part 2! (Don’t worry, no spoilers!) People were so upset about some of the diversity in this game, but like, why??? What’s with this mob? Is the mob the majority or just the loudest assholes on the block.

Something that keeps coming up for Monika is the concept of duality – where something (or even someone) is both good and bad. It’s about finding that balance and trying to go from there.

Fresh into our book of the month, White Fragility, we talk about what the “White frame” is and what other -isms navigate in a certain frame (sexism, ableism etc.). Something that a lot of people don’t get (hellooooo incels, etc) is that just because we haven’t experienced it doesn’t mean that it’s not valid.

Repeat that again for the people in the back: JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVEN’T EXPERIENCED SOMETHING YOURSELF DOESN’T MAKE SOMEONE ELSE’S EXPERIENCE LESS VALID.

It’s about the person: the valid point is a person’s emotion. We need to accept people for their own experiences.

And further from this – and something that we all need to get better at doing, is accepting and understanding that people have a past that we (and they) may or may not like. There might be decisions and mistakes from someone’s past that makes everyone a bit uncomfortable.

People need to be allowed to make mistakes and make mistakes, reflect on their life and grow, learn and change from there. Yes, we need to hold people accountable to be better versions of themselves, but not at the expense of holding back their growth.

There is beauty in failure and beauty in being wrong.
You’re not a bad person because you did something bad.
You are not a bad person because you made one poor decision.

You are allowed to grow and learn as a person. Your entire experiences up until this point have led you to where you are now. If there’s stuff from your past you wish didn’t happen – try to think of it that without it, you wouldn’t know that part about life.

We also understand that not everyone can reflect about their life.

We also totally know what it’s like to care so damn much all the time. About everything. Ever. All the time. It never, ever stops.

It’s hard to care so much all the time and it hurts too. Our conclusion: Caring is hard. But we won’t ever stop.

On the note of caring so much – this is why you need to fill your own cup first!! If you tear the house down and you’re not able to rebuild the house then what’s the point. When you look after yourself first and make sure you’re okay, you’ll be better equipped to serve others.

What did you think of this episode where we legit talked about everything on our brains!? Let us know!

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If you’ve enjoyed this episode, please check out some of our others!

• Geek Interview: Life as a Professional Feminist with Virginia Mendez from The Feminist Shop
• Geek Interview: An Insight into Second Wave Feminism with Professor Taliep
• Geek Discussion: Twitch and #MeToo with BiggusBennus!

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Geekily yours,
Amanda & Monika